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Become a PatronLabel Maker On The Fritz
Farmers Market Artwalk Assholes
Musical Carpentry
Ball Bouncing In The Barrio (No Outcry)
Elsa: She Wolf of the Abortion Clinic
The Fat Kid In The Babylon 5 T-Shirt
The Rise Of The Machines (Starring Danny Devito As Himself)
Manic Mondays AKA The "Fat" Bangle Gets High
The Inverse Relationship And Reduction Theory
Sudden Low Impact (Ripped 'N' Rude)
Syndicated Television Programs
Freeway Killings
Support Your Local Bandidos
Susanna Hoffs
Allowing One Elbow
Dead Corey
Between Wrong And Right
Biscuit Bender
A/C Window Unit (6000 BTUS)
Medical Billing Specialist
Waco Texas Mix Tape
Culdesac Block Party
Death Bed Confession
Ghost of Soybean Futures
Helping Humanity (Do The Funky Chicken)
No Holds Barred Brawl At The Brewery
Investments Dividends and Downloads
Great Economic Meltdown
Marital Bliss (Stuffing Socks Down The Front Of Your Pants)
No Fees On Movie Tickets
Hard Rockin' Shit
Sound of One Hand Clappings
Jesus In Sweatpants
Forty Miles of Bad Road
Rolling Sevens In The Boneyard
They Call Him The "Black And Mild"
Bad Night At The Okay Corral
Video Will Play After Ad
Black Leather Overalls
Ghosts That Don't Speak English
The Shit Song By The Marshall Tucker Band
McGruff The Crime Dog Bounty Hunter
Book Not As Good As The Movie
Orchestral Bowel Movements In The Dark
Standing Alone With The Bowl
Mexicans Love Metallica: Based On A True Story
Medieval British Blues Band
Even Witches Get The Broomstick Blues
Exploitation At Every Opportunity
Some Gave All All Gave Some
Sad Slice Of Stale Birthday Cake
Janeane Garofalo
This Is NPR Radio
Small Fires Put Out With Blankets
Bent Over From Butthurt Bullets
White Bread Manifesto
Wrong Doings In The Cistene Chapel
Matthew Brodericks' Left Butt Cheek
Simple Solutions To Everyday Problems
Tree Fiddy
The Walrus With The Sagging Sad Face
George Harrison's Pinky Toe (in thrilling mono)
If Gene Krupa Can Do It
Taking A Man's Pants
The Dynamic Do-OH!!!
The Unbearable Easy Lifting To Avoid Back Injury
A Conversation Interpreted Incorrectly Or Is It Thursday Yet
Hospital English Courage
Lazy Nun On A Smoke Break
Die Hard Outtakes
Money For Nothing (Chicks At A Reasonable Rate)
Bulk Rate Postage
Howard Zinn: A Peoples' History Of Party Pooping
Righty Tighty Lefty: OH MY GOD!!!
Your Mom Is Off Gluten
Buy One Get One Free
Lather, Rinse, Repeat Offender
Standardized Testing
Long Walk In Winter (w/Winger)
corduroy jackets with patches on the elbows
Eat Some Dope And Some Potato Chips
Tables And Chairs: No Jacket Required
3rd Level Donors Get An All Access Weekend Pass
More Fun From The Front Row
That Is Where I Wander Off
A Marriage Reduced To Ruins
Blowing Weed Rings In Your Face
Straight To The Hips (Never Boiled)
The Most Interesting People Are Found Sleeping
Whistling At A Wake
Man On The Moon: A Retrospective [sic]
Vomiting On The Bus
Crisis During The Suez Canal While We Slept
The Prince And The Pauper And The Sorcerer's Apprentice
Skip Ad In 5 Seconds
Full Blown Aids (john fogerty sued himself)
Blue Moon Over The Danube
Bland Ass Potato Salad
Conway Of Twitty's Bathrobe
Patti Smith Splits Her Pants (Frosted Bush)
Failure To Protect The End Of The World
Waiting In The Breeze With The Low Birth Weight Boys
On A Hunting Trip, The Trigger Slipped
Even Keyboard Players In Cover Bands Get The Blues
The Last Sandwich Meets Its Maker: A Haircut Gone Stale
There Are Many Soaking Wet Paper Towels
Another Idea Left For Dead
Topo Chico
Gated Communities (Lost 10 Lbs AKA Skinny Jeans)
Good Cop: Fat Cop
Late Nights Spent Alone Listening To Tom Waits Whine
A Nice Slow Romance
The Bland Witch Project
The Mission Meant More With A Motive
Bovine Is In The Eye Of The Beholder
Your Hopes Go Down The Drain
Mary Elizabeth Masterbatonio
Exercising The Third Eye
Leaning On The Left Fandango
Fat Thighs (They're Sweaty)
Milkshakes>Murder
Pre-College Courses
It's In The Way That You Use It
Love Theme From Top Gun
The Mother Of Mother Teresa
Saul Of Tarsus: God's Weakling
Anti-Heroes Wear Plaid
Nothing Down Deals Over The Phone
Last Of The Mohicans In Stereo
Eating Crisco With A Spoon
Midlevel British Blues Band
The Purpose Of Paper Mache Paperweights
Dragstrip Queen Blvd
Making Sure You Save The Receipt
Instant Support
Starting A Controlled Explosion
Police Officer's Interests Clashing-N-Cashin'
Sting: Left Hand Tantric Sex Magic
Becoming Rod Stewart
And All The Fat Girls Loved Tupace
Taking Opiates Rectally
Moderate To Severe Rhumeatoid Arthritis
The Ship Always Goes Down
An Open Bar Combined With A Closed Mind
The Poor Carpenter Played "They Drove Ole' Dixie Down"
Freeway Killing Spree
Splish Splash Worried Wounds
Paying People To Spit In Your Mouth
South Dakota (Low Birth Weight)
Packed With Peanuts
Gleam The Light Fantastic
Drugs, Violence, Plagiarism, Gambling Debts
With A Little Help From My Friends
Sitting In A Cold Tub Crying
Sodomizing People
The Short Pier Without The Long Walk Off It
Opiates And Jews For Jesus
Edward Snowden's Day Off
A Short Fuse Off Of A Long Night Of Binge Drinking
A Confession
Smuggler (With A Heart Of Gold)
An Altercation At An Applebees
NPR Tote Bags And The Bargain That Is
Saturday Night At The Sizzler
Left Lane To Wonderland
Wheelbarrow Blues
Shooting Outside A Sports Bar
The Guy From Depeche Mode And His Iron Underwear
Patriotism: The Last Vestige Of The Scoundrel
Evolution Is Slow, Smallpox Is Fast
Fear And Self-Loathing In Las Vegas
Janis Joplin's Ugly Tits: A Memoir
A Day Without Rain
Interpretative Dance (For Dummies)
Ethel Everly Seniors Give Back To The Community
The New Age Of Information
If You Are Not Of Legal Age: Close This Window
After School Special Shooting
A Run Down Schmuck With A Ten Dollar Prayer Book
Austin Backpack Activist
A Fork In The Road: Up The Ass
Food For Thought: Leftovers For Later
Satan: Orginator of the Motel 6 Action Phrase
Sammy Hagar's Final Cabowabo
Whichever Perry Was In The Band At The Time
There Was A Convertible Outside The Hotel
The Roof The Roof Is On Fire
Richard Marx Vs. Rod Stewart: Dueling Dumbasses
The Dad From Robocop
Doesn't Reheat Well
Uneasy Silences With A Dash Of Daring Doo
Love In The Time Of Chasity [sic]
Murdering Molly Wringwold
The Tiny Tiny Toenails Are The Hardest To Clip
Batman Returns! (to find the couch missing)
Can't Get Enuff (By Buffalo Winger Stop)
Interest Rates Are Stable Again
Basic Math: Carry The One
The Machine Will Reset If Spat Upon
Looking Back To See Nothing But Skid Marks
Belinda Carlise Was A Fat Chick
Bridge On The River Kwai
Options: The REALLY Big Race
All The Pop Songs Best To Be Forgotten
Public Enema
Dating For Busy Professionals
Empty Calories At Halftime
French Onion Fun Fun Fun Fest
Draft Dodger In The 21st And A Half Century
A Bad Case Of Bud Light/Dry
2pac Consumed With Paranoia And Self-Doubt
A Reasonable Request
The Sad Saga Of Jimmy Dean And His Sausages
Comedian Tim Allen's Proctologist Isn't Right Upstairs
Glenn Danzig: Air Traffic Controller
Mr. Holland's Anus
Professional Attitudes
My Little Pony: Fire Walk With Me
Mediterranian Death Cult War Bride
Pencil Fighting For Profit
14 Ankle Power Bottom
Beaten With Cases Of Bud Light
Inventing A Subject To Be Outraged About
Failed Investments
Cultural Appropriation Pirates Seldom Get The Blues
That Shit Song By The Marshall Tucker Band
A Reckoning And A Withdrawal (Violence)
Gentle Jesus, Meek And Mild
The Bassist In The Pixies Had A Big Butt
Rollover And Roll Under: Open Manhole Surfin'
Puttin' A Pin Thru The Skin Of A Balloon
Leather, Rinse, Repeat (Offender)
The First Wooden Cooking Spoon
Getting Groceries On Credit
The Founding Of The First Farewell
The Bullshit Bisexual Blues
Sedge Way Hapsburg Leftist Leaner
Alternative Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous
Bowling Alleys By The Freeway
Deriving Sexual Pleasure From Being Treated Like A Toilet
Mr. Peanut's Date Rape Pyschosis
Paul Stanley's Chest Looks Like A Carpet
Black Entrenpenuer Magazine Party
The Jolly Green Butthole
The Question Of When And Where
Flare Ups And Abdominal Pain
With A Hot Cup Of Cocoa
One Red Bean Stuck To The Bottom Of The Bowl
Wal-Mart Refused To Stock The Latest
Forgotten Hot Hits (The Last Of The AM Radio)
The Many Faces Of A Man Who Finally Understood
Public Enema's Big Takeover
The Garden Was Small Potatoes
Pencil Thin Paper Weight Valley
Deconstructing The Decoder Rings
Street Hassle And The Art Of The Deal
Young Earth Creationists Counting Calories On Cocaine
Sweatpants In A Non-Gym Environment
Tantric Sex, Lies and Electrical Tape
Worthless Like Baltic Avenue
Gym Membership At A Discount
That Scene From Regarding Henry
Diane Keaton: Sex Symbol
Passion For...FASHION
Gentle Jesus, Meek and Mild Part Deux
Agents Of Satan Beyond Thunderdome
The Night Shift
Hanoi Fiction
Tactless Think Tanks (In August)
Dean's List Vandalism Party
Lolligagging On The Outback
Them Call Center Blues
For Sale: Baby Shoes
The Byrds Have Hallowed Out His Eyes
No Candles On The Cake
Sex Workers Are Depressed
Vagueness With Low Impact Aerobic Activity
Drafty Apartment, Sweaterless Friend
Suffering Under An Economic System
Tote Bags Bearing Maplethrope's Syrup
Buttfuckin' In The Orient
Retirement On A Dollar A Day
Under Sea Over 40 (Action Central)
Breakfast Of Third Level Donors
Pac Man Fever Leads To Diabetes
Grandpa's Off His Meds Again
Angry At The White Man
Failed Marriages End Badly
The Infinite Expanse Of Endless Time
Left Turns When It's Still Not Okay
Math Can Be Complicated Without A Calculator
Snuff Films On Basic Cable
Fat Guy Wearing A Tight Batman T-Shirt
Two In The Pink And One In The Sink
Native American Me
The Curse Of Fresh Love
The Adventures Of Mariah Carey's Back Fat
Over Fisting Affects Wildlife
The Myth Of The Working Class Martyr
Jim Morrison's Final Habit
The Murders In The Rue Morgue
Changing The Radio Dial To Avoid The Static
The Car Commercials Never Cease
Barbecue Stains On His White T-Shirt: A Killing
British New Wave Of Heavy Metal
When The Oxygen Network Faults Its Fan Base
The Last Gasp Of Civilization Will Be When You Are...
McGruff The Crime Dog Kidnapped By Cannibals
That One Novel That Steinbeck Should've Wrote
Outlaying Areas May Experience Some Power Outtages
Trans Fat And Transparent Politicians
King's X (The Complete Metaphorisis)
Kevin Pollocks' Colon Pollops Pop
Stuffing Pillows With Long Knives
Standing Outside A Window...Wondering
Burning Man: A Gathering For The Ball-Less
Requested Loans Defaulted
A Night Without White Satin
Diet Shasta Orange: A Loathe Story
The Long And Winding Road
The Neck Beard Totenkompf Kommando
All Mattresses Are 99 Percent Off
Chairs Missing: The Belt Was Loose
Master-Piece-Of-Shit Theatre
Buying The Farm
The Horror Of Homosexual Dreams Unwarranted
A Lesson In Evidence
Clean Needles
A Crisis Unresolved As Dinner Gets Cold
Ladies' Man (Goes Dancing)
Wandering Through The Desert
Soft Bored Dead Eyed Simpletons
The Second To The Last Unicorn
An Apostle And A Warm Bowl Of Porridge
A Downward Stabbing Motion
Kermit The Frog On A Serious Bender
Naked As A Jaybird
Enhanced Interrogation Techniques (Utilize Fear Scenarios)
Jesus Till Sweatpants
Post-Modern Iron Age Poet
A Subtle Form Of Rape
The Last Temptation Of Christ (In Glorious Mono)
A Child Of Divorce
Jurassic Butt: Fallen Dingdom
Firehydrants And Waterpark Fouls
Slow Times During The Not-So-Super Bowl
Languishing The Linquini (Stoned Alone)
Tupac: Activist Upright Citizen
Motel 6 Wears Prada
Oklahoma Opium Is Okay
Creating A Panic
Art Imitating Life
Patti Smith Never Shaved Her Armpits
Marital Problems That Counseling Can't Cure
In Case The Bomb Doesn't Detonate
Pipe Cleaners Make Great Conversation Pieces
Abstinthe Makes The Heart Grows Founder
Paul Hogan: Australian For Has Been
Paul "Hulk" Hogan
Looking Through An Old Bible With Missing Pages
Lounge Act In Fresno
North Oklahoma
Candid Danzig
Chicken Cordon Blue Danube
S.E. Hinton Was A Fat Chick
I Want Alot (So Come On)
Looking Back Towards The Leaving Mother
Plessy V. Ferguson's Failed Sitcom Plot Transcript
The New Noise Is At Your Doorstep
The Untold Story Of Revelations Chapter Twelve
Fine Dining: Let Me Go Rock-N-Roll
Free With Ads
ALL The Fixins
A Goal Without A Deadline Is Just A Dream
Fat Guys Who Think They're Tough
Modern Rock Hits (Can't Get Enough)
Those Tight Pants
Billy Joel The Fairgrounds Cattle Auction Tour
Unintentional Vengeance: The Patron Saint
It Has Come To This
New Money And Immigrant Poverty
August Nights In Utah
Everybody Finds Jesus In Prison (A Love Story)
Billy Joel's Butthole
Jacking Off Into A Ceiling Fan
On The Next Episode Of "It's About To Go Down!"
Aerosmith's Last Gasp And Nobody Can Name...
American Teenage Garage Hoot (Big Town)
Frozen 2: Still Frozen
Bible Belt Bullet Belt (Tori "Torn Anus" Amos)
In Love With Machines, Speed And The Future
The Wind Upon That Ole' Rugged Cross
The 8th Voyage Of Sinbad And The Stolen Valors
And The Meek Shall Inherit The Earth
Stage Antics, Wild Hairstyles: Women In Film
Phil Collins' Complexities And Low Fever Dreams
The Solitary Hit From The Band Finger 11
When Every Little Bit Of Hope Is Gone
Vicious Fisting
Profiles In Courage
Unemotionally Unavailable Risk-Addicted Sexual Outlaws
Tom Araya's Leather Pants
With Your Grey Shoes And Your Highwater Pants
Joan Jett's Flat As A Board Ass
Turkish Figs
Visit Advertiser's Site
Boring Suicide Prevention
Flat Butt Society
Football Phone
Free Thirty Day Trial
Adultery, Embezzlement, and Tax Evasion
Too Many Gays On Webtoons
Garth Brooks: Gropin' The Wind
Plastic Bottle Blues
Triumph Meets Tragedy: On The High Ground
Eskimos Don't Eat Oranges
Omar Epps Understands The Complexity Of Jazz Fusion
Free Range Game Hen Hockey
After All Is Said There Is Always Chicago
Annoying Edge Of Paper Torn From A Spiral Notebook(Blues)
For The Lucky Still Have To Wait
The Desert Claims AT The Window Cleaning Equipment
Arguing With A Gay Actor
They Don't Even Allow Drums At The Grand Ole Opry
HUGE Jackman
The Raping Of Mary Tyler Moore
Saint Peter's External Regret
Your Video Will Play After 5 Seconds
Hard Times They Come To Us All
The Sound Of One Hand Clapping
Human Telephone
For Yer Careful Reconsideration
Like A Drunk George Jones
The Ghost Of Soybean Futures
White Washed Trash
Bad For The Economy (That's Fake ANYWAY)
Echo And The Bunnymen Read Watership Down
Easy Action Baked Beans Over Toast
Columbo Dumbo Dumber
Long Line At The Stop-N-Rob
Lidless Toilets: Fear Of An Invisible Republic
The Hell That Is Zakk Wylde In The Wild
Weighing Five Tons: Wearing The Smallest Possible Hat
Bent Over A Bank Railing (Let The Times Pringles)
Playin' Round The Railroad Tracks
Expectations To Be Leveled With Apathy
Plagues Of Self-Doubt
Dan Rather's Doubt
Slammin' Dominoes On The Tabletop
De Ja Butt
It Happens Sometimes: People Just Explode
Duck Pond Diving Board
All Night Disco Swing Party
Two Hour Disco Swing Party
A Holocaust Dental Survivor
The Terror That Came Beyond The Sea
Oceans Apart Day After Day
Prescriptions Filled While You Shop
The Light Was Yellow Sir
There By The Turnstyle
Secret Shopper Goes To Bloomberg's House
Paulette M. Bungaloo
Eric Crapton
Like Sands In The Hourglass...
Workin' On Yer Birthday: The Barista Blues
Leaving The Playing Field
Knife Fight At The Golden O.K. Corral
Air Tight (As They Call It)
Coneheads Was A Flop
Eating...Gambling
They Wore Their Van Halen T-Shirts The Day After The Show
Color T.V.
Looking For Mr. Goodbar
The House With A Cock In Its Walls
Making Up For All Those Cocaine Disco Bashes
Forging Signatures On Historical Documents
Wishes Come With Conditions
Bringing Demons Down From The Stars
Eric Crapton's Brush With Fate
Finding Frames That Fit Your Face
Publishers' Clearing House Sweepstakes
Detuned Piano In The Basement
When The Chips Are All Accounted For
She Came Up With Ideas In The Shower
Fried Coffee Chicken Strips (You Must Be Annie)
Mick Jagger Struggles With Stereotypes On The Brown Sugar So
Buckets Of Chicken
Dancing For Chicken
An Argument Over Baked Potatoes
Mary Higgins Clark
Barren Shelves: Butter Knife Fight
The Artist Formerly Known As Prince
Such A Familiar Face
Building Muscle Under Fat
Wage Slaves And Daytime Talk Shows
Pasta With White Chicken: Peas & Carrots
Sometimes The Book Is Not As Good As The Movie
Sharp Shooters Next To A Cadillac Coup DeVille
Setting Up A Career Day Booth
The Largest Zit Ever Encountered On That Side Of The Street
Multiple Bombings: Three Trains And A Bag
Active Shooters And The Short Bus Of Tomorrow
Bleeding From The Ass
Dating Black Men In Stereo And Thrilling Mono
B.K. Broiler Knight Kings
A Bitter Birthday Party
The Great Economic Meltdown
Death Bed Confessions Of A Lifelong Fan Of Volleyball
The Biscuit Bender (On The Conveyor Belt)
A Subtle Difference Between Wrong And Right
One Of The Coreys Is Dead
Video Does Allow One To Make A Physical Connection
The Penis Of Online Banking
Mr. Slick Heavy Metal Band
Expendable Fodder For Christ
Senator With A Mouthful Of Muffins
"Newman's Own" Activism
Sodium Soaked Salvation
Van Halen Twister Soundtrack Hit
White Guy With Dreadlocks: Bad Decisions
All The Kids Wanna Sniff Some Glue
Warped Punk Rock Bowling Tour
Magic The Gathering: Soy Gives Guys Boobs
Oral Sex Legally Defined As Sodomy
Talking Loudly Heavy Breathing
No Amount Of Serious Soul Searching
Love Has No Labels
Scenes From Seinfeld
An Emotional Bloodlettting
Working In Experimental Theatre
A Poor Immigrant Belgian Teen
Masterbator Of Pupppets
Trotsky Marched Under A White Flag
The London Of Jack The Ripper
Endless Breakfast Buffet Without The Guilt
Targeted By Fiscal Conservatives
And It Came To Pass That Jim Morrison Got Fat
Bent and Butt-Fucked Over A Bank Railing
Jack Kennedy's Murder In A Cold War Context
That Scene From Higher Learning
Ankle Monitor Adventure Time
Bad Times At The Casino Royale
Holding Up The Line At Luby's
Leaving The Tree Up Till August (Drink Coors)
Signals Being Uptight By Merely Looking Constipated
Long Winded Narrative
Hydroflouric Acid Blues (The The Trip)
Out For Love, Up For Blood
Secret Asian Man
That Real Long Truvada Commercial
Rico Decided That He Needed To Calm Down
The Globalists Are Coming (Eat More Wheat)
The Store Manager Has Aggressive Sales Goals This Year
Bill Is A Failed Executive At A Manufacturing Plant
Forgetting How To Tango
Big Gubment Comin' To Take The Guns Away
Real Small Talk (Winnebago)
The Adventures of an Ex-Cuban Diplomat
Wild College Parties
Hanging Out At Airport Paperback Racks
82 Degrees In Downtown Saigon
Diet Cola (Paying For Less)
Sitting Informally: Sport Shirt, Bermuda Shorts
West Antartic Ice Sheet Acid Party
The Long Look Inward
Shocking Brutal Character Development
Fan Fiction Big Burnout Bingo
Cutting Coupons With A Big Ass Bowie Knife
Pineapple Express Didn't Live Up To Expectations
The Bond Proposal Failed To Pass
Too Early For A Burger
A Man In His Thirties Wearing A Tweed Jacket
The Cucumber In The Disco Pants
No One Is Keeping The Sabbath
Microwave Ovens Are Becoming More Modern
He Drove Al El Dorado
When The Area Involved Is Small
And The World Wept
Before Wham Made It Big
Jesus Takes The Wheel (And The Cake)
See That My Grave Is Kept Clean
Door Prizes Awarded At The End
True Truly Terrible (Story)
Bowling In The Bahamas
Afrocentric Biology Majors Love The BBC
A Dull, Dull Armageddon
Running Out Of Guest Towels
It Used To Be Expensive To Make A Phone Call
The Lilipads Are In The Pond
Alternate Ending With Commentary
Getting An Airtight From The Cast Of Friends
Raw Garbage Builds Strong Bones
Implosion At The Birth Of Radio
Lousy Saturday Night
Mothers Who Eat Their Young
Late Lunch Early Breakfast
Action Has Been Taken
Dunking A Potato In A Cup Of Tea
Not That Tomato (A Sandwich Story)
Ruthless Pursuit Of The Early Popes
Moon Face With Tight Glasses
Socrates: Navel-Gazing Lazy Egocentric A-Hole
Libido On Display (With Diamonds)
Martin Luther Was Constipated When He Died
Frederick The Second's Publicist
Freddy Prinze's Prized Possession
About To Get Started
Less Than Zero Addictions Cause Problems
The Time "They" Got Serious
The Coin Kept Coming Up Tails
Lead Violence Leads To Practical Results
Moonlight Sonota (Ding Dong The Witch Is Dead)
A Surge In Female Owned Businesses
An Imagining Of The Overlooked Enterprises Which Are Unique
Tom Cruise's Daddy Issues (That Scene From Magnolia)
10-10-220: That Good Cheap LONG Distance
Asian Face No Accent (Baffling)
The Line Looked Longer From The Back
Desperate For Change (Looking Back Regretfully)
Huge Deals On Wheels
Four Square Over There
Golden Shower Ratio
Making Bank With Primes
The Second Delta Force Pilot
Look At The Aftermath
The Downhill Ski Nose Party Never Quitting
Arguments Over What Wagon To Fall Off Of
Great Fine That Way Please
Glass Ceiling Career Change
Not Exactly Lone
The Elevator Broke Under The Strain
That Dream Where You Are Nude
Yellow Rose Of Texas
Nitro Burnin' Funny Cars In Stereo
The Cost Of Hitting Under Par
South African Apartheid Aids Potato Party
Cocaine Flood The Playground
Evidence Of Progress
Left Turns More Flat Tires (Options Hurt)
The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo With A Stick Up Her Ass
Abs Are Made In The Kitchen
The Last Of The Hot Check Writers
The Guy Wrote A Bad Book (Then Bragged)
The Wide Ass Of Day Akyroyd Unchecked
Long Underwear While The Sun Sets
Two Weeks Later At Another Disco
Baby Blue Windbreaker Regrets
Autodecapitation Sweeps The Lower 48
Audible Bloodlleting Makes The Dailies
They Chose Less Filling
Pitfalls Of Artistic Integrity
The Lockdown Syndicate Salesman
Feed, Wake, Don't Shake
Cognitive Indifference As The World Goes Snap Crackle & Pop
Hawaiian War Profiteering (In Italics)
Then The Underage Girl He Was Banging Gave Him The Finger
Rape Whistle Dairy Heavy Diet
A Man Must Face His Quiet Dignity
Pantera: Rodeo Clowns From Cleveland
He Wore An Old Cardigan
That Scene From The Accused
Spreading Selfishness With A Tin Whistle
Splittin' The Uprights (Double Up)
Folk Punkers Play Rusty Trumbones
Good Work If You Can Get It
The Same Role In The Same Robe
A Wife Beater With A Strong Interest In Cock Fighting
Picked Last In Slow Pitch Softball
Reads Thrasher Magazine
Like Lava Coming From A Volcano: Jesus Healed The Cripples
Give That Damn Dog His Day
Waitin' On that Wiretap Blues
Variety Of Menu Items, Accuracy Of Order
She's Getting By, She's Paying The Rent
He Came To Encounter Thrift
Double Entry Bookkeeping
Convergence Of Capitalism And The Whip
Disaster Movies With The Same Kid
Throwing A Party Then Declaring Disco Dead
Didn't Want To Wear A Seatbelt (Thrown Free)
Those Damn Oklahoma Earthquakes
The Long White Trash Christmas (Mono)
The Long Rail Of Human History
Breaking Into Zoos To Eat The Animals
A Kind Of Bravery That Scientists Admire
The Girls All Wanted To Dance
Bargain Basement Burial Insurance
The Long Backed Girl In The Tight Pants
A Lack Of Better Noise
Eight Donuts
Choking Down A Big Bowl Of Boredom
Merely Raised Issues, He Solved Nothing
Playing Card References Abound
They Will Not Bring Him Relief
The Pagan Pajama Party
Most Dune Buggies Are Jalopies
Dope Ridden Unprotected Street Sex
Saturday (In The Park)
He Wrote For The Best Nudie Mags
Before They Widened The Roads
Died Clutching The Sports Section
Aisles Of Yellow Coupons
Raised On Piggly Wiggly
Events Mistaken For Omens
And The New Wavers Did Nothing
Lounging Around Downtown
The Mayo Went South And Sour
Repeat Offender Class ($199)
Mostly An Acquired Taste (The Death Mambo #666)
Loose Morality For Lease/Rent/Purchase
Patient Is With The Clergy
Reading Rainbow In The Privacy Of Your Own Home
Someone Championed This
Tubas: That's Where Our Tax Dollars Went
Emma Can Pick A Dick (The Joy Of Jail)
Killed Crossing The Crosswalk (Life's A Beach)
The Song Was Heavy On The Horns
By Means Of Narcotics
Bacteria Under The Gumline
Cause The Green Hornet Sucks
Low Sodium Fritos (Goin' Out With A Bang)
You Can Get Yards Running In The Wrong Direction
Unbridled Artistic Expression
A Fruit That's Difficult To Juice
Power Tools Untethered To An Outlet
Busting Nuts And Moves (YOUR face)
Eight (Is Enough) Years In Tibet
Gritless Arkansas (Waffle House Blues)
Familiar With The Basic
Gig 'Em Aggies
Backpacking With Nothing But Regret
On The Surface It Sounds Bad
Paula Cole Let Down Her Hair (All Gone)
ADT: Because We're Afraid Of Our Neighbours
Harley Davidson Sweat Shirt
Faith Hill Based (Up Tempo)
Culture Starved G.I.s Selling Encyclopedias
Taping Songs Off The Radio
IFC Movie of the Week
The Boulder Murders
The Numbers Didn't Work Unplugged
It Felt Okay At The Time
Wasn't Happy Go-Go Dancing
Cleaning Out The Gutters
Captains Of Industry
Online Banking (Know Your Finances)
The Kind Of Truth (Karma Boomerang)
Vegas, Not To Gamble But To Buffett
Dependable Performance (Thoughtful Design)
Go Kart Racing (For Papers)
Hobo With An Oboe
Drunk On Rifle Fire
Danzig III: How The Mop Flops
Battling Extinction
Elevator Action (Gettin' The Shaft)
Lake Flacid
The Guy From Godsmack And His Mean Motorcycle
That Bad Taste In Your Mouth (Forsaken Saviors)
Tune In, Turn On, Tap Out
Using A Word To Define Itself (Sweatin' Bullets)
T-Shirt That Read: One Cock At A Time
Poorly Rendered Street Art Portraits
Faith Under Fire (Long Shot Short Pass Hallaf'n'lujah!)
West Of The Iron Curtain (Smackdown In B&W)
Prostitution For Pot (Backdoor Man)
Open Windows Private Party Clenched Fists
An Opened Bag Of White Rice Stares At You From The Abyss
Lights And Sirens
In A Rented Room In Houston By The Dance Clubs
Violating Examination
A Man Whose Opinions Were Listened To
Warriors On Horseback Was A Thing
Someone Has To Salt The Sidewalk
Patti Smith Refused To Eat Her Vegetables
Patient Zero In The Doubt Game
Regret Rolls In Spades
The Evil That Lurks Behind Ordinary Events
Gun Deaths Per Capita
Human Ambition Is The Real Monster Here
The Pleasure In Patterns Is Perfect
Big Box Store Luggage
Dates With Dull Men
Old Hat Parlour Tricks
Noise Level May Be Moderate To High At Times
That Woman Needs A Hug
Said Religion Of Peace (Lackluster Sales In Bath Mats)
Currently More Marginalized Community
Outrage Center For Troubled Youth
Status Update: Front Page Bold Type
The Descent Is Necessary To Scare You Straight
Product Placement
By Dawn's Early Light
A Demanding Desk
Reheated Leftovers (Fridge On The Fritz)
No Public Bathroom
everybody wants to sit around and watch murder
Out There Thuggin', Actin' A Fool
Adult Acne Is A Downer
Yelling At Kids On Skateboards
Stabbing Through The Juicy Pink Sweatpants
Divorce Double Feature
Angry Theatre Kids Running Around Without Supervision
Part Of The Oppressed
Shawshank Redemption Review
Interesting Multiple Angles (DVD Extras)
Terror Filled Public Service Announcement
Paint Thinner Blues
Violent Crime In Action
Soggy Bottom Boy
Trying A New Hour
Assisted Living (Blood Money In Stool)
Holding It Down Like A Bottle Of Crown
They Came To Town (One Original Member)
Predetermined Rate Of Teenage Pregnancy
Dylan Goes Electric
Endless Choice: An Option Not To Participate
Trade School
Passion At The Pump
Pushing Tin (Real Good)
An Overweight Woman Tries Tai Chi
A Lack Of The Limelight
Home Invasion
Voter Fraud At Half Price Books
God's Light Answering Prayers
The Bank Closes On Sundays
Weathering The Quiet Dawn
Spencer's Gifts Now Sells Butt Plugs
Thudding Batons, Unleashed Dogs
Found Glory
He Had A Copy Of Ivanhoe With Him
Over 40
The All-Night Garage Sale
Breaking Divine Wind
Forking It All Over
He Owned A Pearl Handled Pistol
Fifteen More Minutes
Chunky's Campbell Soup (In A Can)
The Kid Found A Puppy And Wanted To Keep It
Lessons Learned Under An Overpass
The Needle Broke Off In His Arm
Embracing The Necessary Forms (by the throat)
Parking Is Free On The First Of The Month
More Bargains In The Basement
His Job Was To Write Dear John Letters
Bad Deal With The Bookworm (Half Price Blues)
Making Deadlines Alive And Kicking
Lance Corporal's Late Night Bender
Stains On The Stove
The Chemistry Of Nitrogen Fertilizers
Leaving All The Lights On
Letterbox Is Boring To Sit Through
Winter's Discontent (Coupon On Back)
Firestorms Sweep The Slums (Burning Babies)
Megadeth Owns Early UFC Copyrights
That Woman Hurt Me
An Artist's Rendition (Torn Rotater Cuff)
These Pockets Lack A Zipper
Wet Rags With Gasoline
Unforgiven Studen Loans
The Agenda Will Be Mailed In
Caribbean Countries Exports Consists Mostly Of Bananas
Price Gouging On The Internet
The Bag Broke Along With Her Water
Nine Times Out Of Ten
Lacking Direction Yet Still Driving
She Thought She Was Funny
Remembering Sarah Marshall (Spanish Bootleggers...)
Oily Olay (League Of Women Voters)
That Is What The T-Shirt Said
Catching The Bad Break
Fell On The Keys
Apricots And Acorns
Figured The Net/Gross Worth (Leprechaun Rock)
The Fries Weren't In The Bag
He Was Lucky, The Cup Was Empty
Without Bones Or Belief
Bringing The Balance Down (Complete Anger)
Where Isn't Waldo
Walking Past The Open Windows
A Warning Shot
Fantastic Cleans Up The Worst Spills
Night Of The Living Wage
The Budget Must Be Balanced
The Other Night There Was A Sale
Long Bows And Lariats
The One Percent (Unhappy With Waiters Wages)
The Morning Ended Well
The Last Piece Of Birthday Cake
Passing Out At The Pride Parade
The Guy From Disturbed Enjoys An Omelette
Billy Gets A "B"
Gives You Wings
Eating The President's Oranges
The Struggle Isn't Real
Fasting After Labor Day
A Good Game Bird
Out In The Open
Petty Theft Before The Alarm Goes Off
Whistling Through Clenched Teeth
Forced To Move Without Compensation
His Sentiments Exactly
Learning To Forklift
Unfulfilled Fantasies: Stale Chips
The Turn Wasn't Finished
The Chick With The Clever T-Shirt Cries Alone
An Honest Public Search For Identity
Number One In Afternoon Drive Time
Airport Gift Shop Blues
The Fallacy Of An Argument
The Guy From Fall Out Boy Got Fat
Busted
The Can From The City Read "No Hot Ashes"
The Cable Was Out That Week
Plain White Ts (With A Twist)
Her Parents Named Her Blanche
The Source Of The Scent
He Bought Lenny Kravitz Tickets On Purpose
He Stood There With His Mouth Open
Short Distance Runner
In The Path Of The Coming Storm
Peter Gabriel's Co-Option Of African Rythms
Giving The Game Away
Check Out Time Is At Eleven
People Have Tickets
Ants In The Pants
Bending Down To Pick Up A Penny
Another Night Without Windows
Corncob Pipefitter
The Old Queens With Their Low Top Sneakers
The New Oldsmobiles Are In Early This Year
Lots Of Static Coming From The Showerhead
Plotting The Hunger Games
And They Kept Complaining
Life After The Tet Offensive (Updrafts In The Outhouse)
That Other Hit By Toto
White Wine Enema
The Proof And The Pudding
Mark Downs And Mark Ups
Convertible With The Top Down
Hard Rock Radio Junkie
Addiction Is Hilarious
Ass Coming Out The Butt
The Battering Syndrome
Optimal Lard Based Numbering System
Bob Dylan Sounds Like A Balloon Airing Out
Bill Maher's Greasy Glasses
Dubbing Cassettes Off The Radio
Flavored With Carrots And Herbs
Big Bloodbaths Of Excitement
No One Buys Peter Pan On Purpose
The Rapid Thinning Of The Face
Foreclosures Fast Actin' Tinactin
Tennis Stars On Dope
Forged In The Flames (Foot Alergies)
The Kid In The Tight Clash Shirt
The Worst Ever To Hit Wax
The Battle Raged On The Senate
Leaving The Crust On The Bread (Ow, That Hurts Me)
Big Wheel A Keep On Turnin'
Renegotiating Terms Of Service
His Favorite Type Of Milk Shake
Bachelor Breakfast (Cold Pork Chops And Pizza)
Another Wunderkind Oscar Nominee
Pipes Need Attention
Drowning In Two Inches Of Water
Ain't I A Woman
Foregone And Forecloses (Housing Shortage)
That Bowflex As (Stereophonic Sound)
Black Oak Arkansas
That Kind Of Gay (Two Steps Back)
No Business Like Minding Your Own
MythBusters: Afterlife
The Best A Man Can Get
UB40 Opened Up The Show
A Mouth Is A Mouth
The Price Of A Barrel
King Of The Little Magazines
Multiple Complaints Of Workplace Behavior
Huffing The Cheap Oven Cleaner
Counting Of The Crows (Bad Lyrics)
Soggy Corn Tortilla
Singer, Songwriter, SEX WORKER
Folding On The First Coin Toss
Low Cost Prescription Drugs
Hold On To This Pigeon
Hair Tye Dye
All The Candy Was Distributed
Tight Jeans Worn Over Underwear
Egg Whites After Labor Day
Goddamn The Pusher Man
Everlast's Song About High Rents
The Dryer Took A Long Time
Caring To The Point Of Being Bankrupt
The Awful Number About A Jumper
That Ozone Layer
Price And Eye Gouging: Hilarity
Paid In Plane Crashes
Fourten Fifty
A Decision With Hashtags and Hashbrowns
Not Till The Hostages Come Home
Turns The Water Blue
Blankets For Kids In Syria
Requesting A Foam Rubber Pillow
Lakeside Camping Equipment
The Cleaners Had A Sale
Free Form Jazz Hands
Bad News On His Birthday
Systematic Racism
Throes Of Opoid Addiction
A Concern Over Imported Beer
That Shitty Song From (Kraft) Singles
They Stopped Serving Breakfast
The One Really Bad Orange
Shocking Moments In Rock And Roll
The Rust Stain Moved With The Wind
The Results Were Unprecented
Everyone On The Television Was Gay
Moth Eaten Trousers
The Pledge At The Strip Joint
Worshipping Damaged Freight
Desk Jobs Look Good On The Morning News
The Passenger Kept Nudes In His Shoes
Preparing For The Fall Out
Preparing For The Fall Out
Flirtin' With Disaster
The Water In The Shower Was Luke Warm
They Actually Left The Light On For Him
The Plunger Failed To Provide
The Power Of Soft Seltzer
Cough Wheeze Then Puke
Blitzed On Bad Import Beer (Corona Cancer)
Distressed Jeans (What Would Dan Rather?)
Putting Powder On Tennis Balls (In A Pringles Can)
Folding The Guest Towels
Big Time Terminal (Rehashing The Hits)
That Commercial With The Nose Strips Gal
Hard Cider (Seltzer Is Good Food)
It Says So In The Song (Aerosmith's VH1 Thing)
There Was No Pancake Batter
That Barrel Went Over The Falls
Family Matters (Heavy Metal Videos)
Somewhere Along The Way
Hurting On The Outside (Foul Ball Blues)
Beatnik Boogie (Slummin' Downtown)
The Afterword Was Better Than The Movie
Turbo Tax
America's Funniest Home Videos
Slow Times At Ridgemont High
Picking Ripe Appels Out Of An Old Barrel
Groggy From The Warm Milk Duds
Left On Read
Tu Madre
The Sweatshirt Didn't Nothing But
Four Times The Fiber
The Cup Was Empty
Low Prices (Waiting To Inhale)
Odds And Asses (Oatmeal On A Stick)
Straight From Nazi Laboratories
The ATM Went Bust
Plain Dirty ClothesCop
Tall Kitchen Bags
The Bourne Degenerency
Forgotten Donut On A Bus Bench
Yard Sale
Yard Sale
Strutter '78 (Dooka Dooka Dooka)
No Forwarding Address
He Kept Asking me
Hip High School Pot Smoking Teacher
That Lane Was Made For Changing
That Chick Had Bad Hair
Those Aren't Pillows
Story Of British Supergroup Whitesnake
Number One (Afternoon Drive Time Radio)
Milk Night Gas (Poor Choices)
Unique Stain Resisting Carpet Action
Cold Pizza
Cast Iron
A World On Fire
Make Believe Traffic Winnings
Big Bowling Balls (dick jokes)
Putin On Th Ritz (Former USSR Hit Maker)
And The Thunder Wept
The Light Bill Grew Out Of Hand
The Wind Cries Foul
There Were No Holes In The Donuts (Broken Clocks)
Fell Out Of Window
That One Recurring Dream
The Leaf Blower Commentary Track
Like A MuthaF'n Fruit Roll Up
The Worth Of A Soul
Scalping Tickets To The Circus
Refurbished Furniture
A Big Pile Of Fruit By The Foot
More Than One In The Oven
Pain At The Pump
The Oven Was Open (Cold Dinner)
Repeat, Rinse Then Whole Grains
The Night He Came Home (Bon Jovi Comeback)
Socks And Sandals
Cramping Up On The Freeway
Made Withou Aluminum Or Perfumes
He Drank Heavily
The Left Lane Is For Right Turns Only
Undercooked Hot Dog Water (Etc)
Black Bears Are Losing Their Habitat
Hooters On Fire (Two For Tuesday)
And A Large Diet Piss
Left Turn Signal Stuck In The On Position
Paperplane Cuts Between The Knuckles
Canned Goods With Laughter
Pickles In They Jar-O
The Guy At The Meat Market Couldn't Handle The Word
Smelling Eggs Each Afternoon
Fiercely Monotheistic
Painting The Windows Shut (Airtight Alibi)
And The Wind Cried Steve
All Along The Bayfront
Titty Bars And Gang Bangs
That Scene From The Great Outdoors
Leader Of The Pack Rats
The Regency Of The Toe-Tappers
Baptizing Others (With Old Wheat Cream)
Fantastic Cutlery (This Way To That Action)
Ordering Pizza Through A Cardboard Tube
Regular Crackers In A Plain Brown Wrapper
That Time When That Happened
Yet Another Wine And Cheese Store
Intermittant Fasting
Even The Milk Turns Chocolate
Sports Journalism (Eating Oats All Day)
Unaffordable Early Bird Accidents
Brand New Convertible (Four On The Floor)
Luke Warm Shower Routine
Juice, Toast And Milk
Investing In Abandoned Oil Wells (Reprise)
The Guy's Name On The Plane Was Larson
They Pissed On Everything
Major Manufacturing (Three Hit Wonder)
Big Time Boogie (Got That Work)
Body Positive Pole Vaulter
Hard Shower In The P.M.
Personal Pan Labrynth
He Forgot To Carry The One
Fantastic Pieces Of Flat Pants
Them Balconies Will Get Ya
Forgetting The Oven Is On
Microwave
Even The Milk Turns Chocolate
For A Thousand Years
Impossible Yet Undewhelmed
Militant Atheism
Wandering Windows (Open Doors)
Overdubbed VHS Cassettes
Worked His Way Up From Sacking Groceries
Uber Murder Bath Water (The Tide Came Out)
Fork In The Water
Novelty Checks With Large Lettering
Stamp Collecting
That One Charlie Daniels Seinfeld "Crossover"
Sweat Stains On The Sheets
Noticing The Awnings
John Updike's Problems With Women
His Shirt Read: Corvette
Free Meet 'N' Beat
His Career Was In The Toilet
He Grew A Beard
Low Speed Paintball (As Advertised)
Off The Sauce On The Cross
Aint' Superstitious
Forced To Choose
That Chick Looked Like A Tube Of Toothpaste
The Fajitas Are Sizzling
She Taught High School
The Olson Twins At Auto Zone
Burnt Offering On The Condor
Day Time Talk Shows
The First Time (Ancien' Regime)
Populating The Planet (Dead Ball On The Field)
Parking Lot Misunderstanding
Cultural Appropiation (Gondolas And Shit)
Vietnam Is Still Going On
Steady Influx Of Metal Bands On The Scene
Crying In The Chapel (Dull Spoon)
Falling Down A Flight Of Stairs
Manufactured Fan Base (Dated References)
8675309
They Had Name For It
Kenny Chesney's Tax Return
Lasik Surgery
Rolling Hills
The End Times
Poor Boy Long Way From Home
Prop Circles
Traffic Was The Name Of A Band
Doing The D.J. Show
Disappointed Ceiling Fans
Fortunes Favor The Fortunate
Sandwich Bags On The Bus
Lathered Up Incredible
He Hurt His Foot
The World Went Wrong
The Guy Wore The Wrong Clothes aka A Sermon
Forgetting To Pay The Wrong Bill
A Bowl Without Borders
Even The Nights Are Better
The Perils Of The Forgotten Food
Air Force Swearing In Ceremony
Hiding Without Mirrors
Highland Parkways On Fire
That Rug Smells Like Old Soup
Increased Reliance On Equity
Too Proud 2 Beg (Reprise)
Found Furniture (On Ramp Blues)
I Heard A Who Done It
Royally Flushed (Toilet Humor)
Dandruff By The Lake
That Ancient Ember Of Awesome
Rage Against The Machine Guy Hurt His Foot
Out Each Window
They Shot The Sheriff
Gaslighting And Greenlighting (Buying The Vote)
Debt Relief
Shoeless And Serious
Wah Pedals And Laid Back Inaction
Reagan's First Wife Left Him Cause He Was Boring
One Dollar For That
The Mortgage
Bleeding Control Station
A Browser With Exceptional Speed
The Roll On The Wrong Way
A Little Sewing Kit
A Man A Plan A Canal
Garth Brooks Complained About Used CD Sales
Attempting To Get Fast And Loose
A Good American
That Scene From U.S. Marshalls
Fiscal Responsibility
Passed Up For Promotion: Bootlegging T-Shirts
The Studio Outtakes Outsold The Singles
He Owned An Envelope
Ain't Living Long Like This
All Of The Tags Were Expired
Up With The Regards
The Slip Was Showing
Flowbee Aerosal Cans In Transit
The To-Go Box In The Fridge
In The Program (TOUCHDOWN)
All Lathered Up (Windchimes IN Motion)
Weak Covid Joke
That Time In Juarez
Not One Jumping Jack
Rolling Down The Banks Of Downtown Burbank
That Doubt In Your Back Pocket
Loose In The Caboose (Before It Gets Soft)
Forgetting To Duck (Soup's Cold...again)
Looking For A Fart Of Gold
The Cock Blocking Fat Friend Who Wants To Leave
Uneven Cooling
Wrestling With The Lard Tomato
Hot Girls In Love
The Sketch Artist (Uneven Lanes)
The Jam Band In Mono Hi-Fi
The Way Looked Easy In The Phamplet
B.U.M. Equipment
Discreet Packaging
Diving Into What The Candidates Gave
Catharic Trauma
Veiled Cargo (Not Another Dime)
Sullen And Without A Useful Wallet
A Fundamental Amount Of Flack
Planning And Purpose
Eating The President's Oranges
Bought And Paid For Reviews
Leaving Everyday At Lunch
Back Catalouge Of Stag Movies
Wandering Towards Tomorrow
That Reality
Worse Off Than That Whore
That Burrito
One Too Many New Radicals
Chopping Word In Underwear Ads
Rolling Lost Highway Stone
Faux Leather Apron
Dressing Up As Mythic Figures
Calling Into Radio Stations To Win Tickets
Pantsed In The Pool
Warning Labels Advertising The Fun
Competitive
Reciting The Alphabet Backwards
Overweight Gut With The Low Self Esteem Girl
The Time At The Beach
Cornholing Elvis Costello
Tortoise Shell Egg Whites
The Artists In X Made A Mistake
Old Shoe
The Contractor With The Dented Truck
The Manager "Musician" With The Analogy
Straight Razor Saturday Night Shave
Fresh Scent
Crumpled Up Clothing On The Ceiling
Excited Jazz Fusion Fans (Lamenting Circles)
Fantasizing Out To The Top
It Came From Columbia (Left Knotted)
Arms Up, Arms Out, Windmills In Odem, Texas
Western Cut Off Shirts With Slogans On Them
Inserted Batteries Included (Soft Food Allergies)
Out Of Season (Booberry For Breakfast)
Advised To Make The Move To San Francisco
Long Underwear Outdoors
Don't Worry About It
Trying To Get Famous
They Followed The Trends
Folded Guest Towels (Dubbed In Italian)
A Found Full Wallet
He Had Become Rod Stewart
Most Normal Guy In Hollywood
Sticking A Fork In It
Dual Wheelie Drive
Random Unmarked Dick Pills
Paying For The Alibi Alimony
Serious Unlucky Odds At The Table
Long Dress Wet With Rain
The Toast Is Texas
Making A Difference In Spades
Time Loss Accident Figures
Slow Learners In The Fast Lane
Mustard Stains On A Yellow Tie
Wireless Razorblades (Tan Car Crash)
The Bees Won't Sting
A Cold Plate Of Plastic Fruit
One Room Schoolhouse
It's Mean To Make Them
The Demand For Decency Fell Upwards
A Nice Feel Good Year
Fire Up The Pit (Miller Time)
She Sold Real Estate And Regret
Things Known
A Rebuilding Process (Painting With Paper Clips)
Butt People
Finding Meaning At The Bottom Of A Well
Recognized The Foul Stench
Bicycles And Runway Models
The Why Of The Why
Headed To Hooters After A Morning Prayer
Stonewashed Acid Jeans (With Holes)
The Mother Who Wanted Another
That Debate
Bravey With Allyship Over Bangledesh
Older Gay Men (Scotch And Tequila)
Such Unimaginable Unbadness
Flamable Checkered Vest Buttons
Figures The Tags Weren't Paid For
Hanging Up The Phone (Big Dust)
Using Her Face As A Restroom Excuse
Voiding The Manufacturer's Warranty
Fixin' To Order More From The Catalouge
Kawasaki For Sale (Low Milage)
Big Crime Pies In The City Limits
Disemboweling The Surviving Cast Of Cheers
Ancestral Rage (Permanent PMS)
Squinting To See What Happens
Parchment Aged Like New Cheese
Frustration Heartburn Bitch Slappin'
Lounge Table Saw
The Place Where It Is
Unsold Unwashed Flatware News
Butts And Bedknobs
Activist Knows Best
Advantageous (Cracked Out)
Plunging Into The Inferno
And It Is For This Reason
Tik Toker With A Fart Of Gold (Whine Rack)
Polerizaton Politics (Smith Without Wessen)
Before The Markets Open This Morning
More Choices For Just A Little Cash
Dropping Everything In The Toilet
Hatchback No Seatbelts (Vinyl Seats Torn)
Explosions Are Fun (Toffee Bars)
The Dry Cleaning
The Saga Of The Pink Sock Sickness
Distracted Drivers
Lita Ford's Peanut Allergy
Raising Pet Bulls On A Budget
Poker Chips And Salsa
The Lamb Was Led To The Slaughter
Selling Scented Candles Stay At Home Mom
The Good Game Of Golf Got Gory
Strong Odors In Bulge Pants
Holes In Shoes And The Theory There
Personal Ads In The Back Of Lowrider Magazines
Staff Picks
Loud Banging Noises Outside The Hop
Jesus Was Asking For It (Expired Cheesecloth)
Torn Scented Soaps (Cold Mustard Pact)
Building A New Neighbourhood
Running Frightened From The Cover Of Tiger Beat
Crushing Aching Doubt And New Money
Tornadoes Tundra Agenda
The Cup Was Empty
That Scene from Mr. Vincent
You Pay $4.99
Relish Hot Dog Topping Not Moment
Dildo Tryouts With A Money Back Option
A Culture Of Crime
The Lucky Barber
Leaping On Tables To Catch A Glimpse
Backwards Bandanas
Ailey Sheady's Asshole (Layin' Brick)
Because Fecal Matter
Buffalo Springfield Wings (Almonds)
Judge, Jury And Plenty Of Fish Dot Org
Open Air Festival Fees
Long Laundry LIst (Filled Out Socks)
Confounded CAT Vomiting
The Lives Of Sailors
The Mail Arrived On Schedule
Distracted Driver (Boneriffic P.I.)
Thinking Egg Rhymes With Dig
Such A Tremendous Talent
Abuse Of The Elderly (Contact Jodie Foster Flick)
Langston Air Force Base (Gotcha)
Just Another Band Out Of Boston (Hung Himself)
Chainsaws, Factories Becoming Industrialized
Asking For An Application
Bowling Plans Thrawted
The Caller ID said "Deshaun"
Wanting To Do Karate
Way Beyond Driven (Exchange Rates)
Moving On From Race (Fiats Fixed)
Third Base Coach Got The Ladies All On Fire
How They Died
Welcoming The Anger Machine
Diamond Crucifixes And A Cold Baked Alaska
Fancy Pants Dance
Scent Of A Trans Woman
Sensodyne Toothplaster
The Daughter Wanted Custody
The Old Queen Met His Barber Halfway
Flustered, Last In Line, Late For Chow
Field Recordings And Cold Tea
Step On The Goddamn Gas (What Are You Doing)
Holding Hands And Skipping Stones
In Sonsequence Of Vintage Countertops
Hottest Juciest Burgers
Translated Into Spanish
Licking The Stamp
Could Really Shred
Caged By Theory
Vice Industries Thriving
Going Back To The Bandanas
Big Game Bargain Hunting (Sasquatch Blooze)
No Public Restroom At The Post Office
Still Bearing His Name
Blowing Bon Jovi
Tickets Still Available
Haul That Food tRuck
43.7 Yards (How Many Kids Did She Rent)
Unlike Jesus, The McRib Came Back
The Good Gasoline At Easy Prices
Tortured By Voodoo
Complicated Stereo Instructions
The Old Man Tipped Two Dollars
The Turd In The Toilet Turned Out To Be A Sock
He Had This, Toga Parting Sea
Didn't Have The Back
Plants, Trains And Nefarious Gentlemen
The Tranny Train With No Brakes
Developing Good Habits (And Maintaing Them)
Clean Sheets
Not A Political Band (Clarient Blowing)
Companies Contracted To Produce Weapons
Covered In Hope
Mixed Ethnicity
Papering Over Your Mistakes (Easy Lovin')
Unfortunate Son (Hiccupping Raw Whiskey)
The Lettuce Was Browning
Plurals, Pronouns, Pizza Parties
Differences In Distribution
Walking Basslines Fingerless Gloves
In The Event Of A Water Landing
Assimilation And The Down Game Sax
Avocadoes: The Good Fat (Tight Tanktop)
Assesment And Retaliation
All The Questions Sounded Insane
WA(te)R All The Timer
Needles And Pins And Exchanges
The Clarity Of The Clarinet (Hydration Is Key)
Woodgrain Alcohol (Windy Meadow)
White Girl With Dreadlocks
Forgetable Levers In Real Time
Cross Contamination
The Well Worn Work Shirt (Pit Stop Stains)
Talking Loudly Behind A Wall
Hype Balloons
Watching Back to the Future 2
The Bad Rodeo Movie
Working With People
Manifestos Manifested Thru Clarinet Blowing
THree Kids (Two Months Salary)
Investing In Anteating Armadillos
Biblical Buffet Portions (Untied Shoes)
We Are Eating The President's Oranges
Payroll Deduction
Facing The Sheet Music (Giving In And Up)
The Wind Cries Toto (Africa)
Binge Watching Buttholes
The Kids Are All Tight
Half Court Game
Plastic Orange Pants (Shooting Horses)
The Guy Heard Things And Believed Them
Partial Birth Abortions Bummed Him Out
That's A Good Catholic
Carton Of Milk, Loaf Of Bread And A Stick Of Butter
Pitchers Of Pale Ale
Cleaning Up Blood Borne Pathogens
Four Forms Of Identification
Turning Saucepans Into Sauce
Worrisome Weather Double Rainbows Ache
Hunting Down Counter-Revolutionaries
T Shirt Cannons At The Starship Show
The Fifth One Didn't Make It To Market
The Band In High Heat
Soft Flames With Oat Crisp Reservations
Single String Solo
Fortune Smiles
Resisting More Onions On Pasta
Talking About The Doom
Puncturing The Refrigeration Tubes Can Lead To An Explosion
Granite Tabletops (Free Estimates)
Kids Shooting Shots Of Straight Grain
Failing To Yield To On Coming Static
Patches And Pastoral Locksmiths (Winter Age)
Corey Taylor's Colon
Letters From The Eastern Bloc
High Handlebars Equal Bad For The Back
Out In The Meadow
School Photos For Less Than One Farthing
The Powerful Scent Of Blood
Eating Tampoons And Making Do
Told Loudly In A Familiar Language
Fifteen Acres
Tap For Options
Taxes (Cut Bob And Weave)
Twangy Zip (Miracle Parachutes)
Forgeting The Big Pain
The Girl From Ipanema Has Ephysema
Those People Looked Like Pundits
The Legend Of Bagger's Vans
Three Metal Dorks (Chick In Shorts)
Tammy Wynette's Tits (Good Paper Plates)
Several Actions Of Thinking
That Was The Case
Licorice Sticks With Lime Sprinkles
Hassle Fraud Free Dovetailin'
To The Exclusion Of All Other Weapons
Cops Running Crazy (Scream 8)
Sneaky Shadows
Arrested In That Jacket
Bending In A Light Wind
On A Drip Drip Basis (Jazz Fest Comeback)
Finding More Wheat
Disposable Active Income (Reviews)
Discovered Completely By Accident
Grease Paint And Rainy Morning Headaches
This Isn't Working
Steady Dick Diet
The Towel Caught Fire In The Microwave
Batteries With Purpose
Textbook Theory
Not Hot Not Not
Bastion Of American Talent
Wrecking The Prisoner Transport
Thrown Under The Bus For A Fat Girl
Intellectuals Have Time To Contemplate
Available On Cassette
Seventeen Times A Sailor
Forty Eight Hours Of Fear
Primeval Man Tends A Fire
He Took His Pants Off (Ladder 49)
Inventing A Past
She Had Surgery
Foreign Checks Stuck In Throats
Large Waves Of Gratitude
Going In And Out Of The House
Deception In Size (Redux)
Thanksgiving Office Party (Its Getting Early)
Another Murder Ballad Band
Midday Television Commerica Anxiety
The Elite Republican Guard (We Shit Bullets)
Having A Pet Is Responsibility
The Older Man And The Sea
Good Days Better Days Fasttrackin'
Tattooed Mommy 13
Big Things Crawling All Over Me
Paperclip Cut Under The Thumb
Boiling In Oil (Lack That Hip Beat)
I Wish I Hadn't Looked In That Car
Six Types Of Burn Victims
Eight Doves Deep (Working Towards A 9)
Feigning Interest In Her Interests
The Verve Versus The Verve Pipe
Small Fries Not Found In Bag
Those Fascinating Car Bombs That Go Boom
Hard Sarcasm And Bulletproof Vests
Sneaking Snacks Into The Theatre Seats
Throwing Away Opportunity At The Arcade
Stay Working, Keep Busy
Burger With The Limp Pickle
A Kind Of Caliber Of Man Who Invests In Fromage
Critical Hoola Hoop Theories (Bad Batches)
Traffic Was The Name Of A Band In The 70s
Chuck Berry Sat With His Legs Crossed
Lazarus' Double
There Is An Ending
Forever Then Another Hot Wheel Car
Tart English Breakfast
They Made It Easy
Finding A Penny And Picking It Up
That Scene In Wall Street
Bowling Alleys And Burger Kings
Tax Free Lifetime
Frosty The Afro-Futurist
Hired From The Cast Of Beatlemania
Losing Lottery Tickets Being Burned In Effigy
Cult Film Fanatic (Loose Fit Dockers)
Publicly Extremity Assessment Team
Price Is Right Pontiac
Preference Promotions And There Was Dave
Rental Fee Refund Processing
Reruns And First Editions
The Light Went Out In The Fridge
A Gay Man's Unwanted Advances And Strides
The Sadness Felt Like Sand In The Shoes
Exciting And Accessible (Look Homeward)
Jason Newstead Buys Pants
Brita Water Filter (Classic Cuts)
Pat Benetar Taking All The Best Shots
Headed Out In An Ultima
Small Couch
She Wanted A Real Burrito
Long Day Out At The Beach
Walking Up To The Big Building
Dwelling In Fear Constantly
A Thousand Soiled Sheets
Waiting For The Take Out Guy
Confused Finding The Door
Dry Shaving In The Shower
Cities In Rubble, Disease Widespread
Draft Beer In Droves
The Kid Brought Home Chik-Fil-A
The Fillings In Their Teeth
Ketchup Soaked Banana Bread
Knowing What The Public Wants (That Smile Movie)
Guns'N'Maury
Fresh Citrus (They All Gave It Their Best)
Even Eggs (Worst Words To Use)
A Wild Wind
He Wore Glasses
The Hinges Are Rusted Here
Reading Unbelievable Things
Refinancing A Car Loan (Good Credit/Bad Credit)
Wifeswapping Alcoholics (Tooth Fairy)
The Troubles On Television (Disturbing Dance Music)
Amber Heard Alert
The Leaves Remained Unraked In The Yard
Flacid (The Water Is Cold)
Ten Quid A Week (Disturbing Dance Music)
Hiding In The Handicapped Stall
Thirty Seconds Of Toweling Off
Elite Lager (Learning and Devouring)
Fighting For The Last Slice (Onions It Is)
Best Of The Best Franks And Beanies
Comparing One To Ted Danson
Scratched Vinyl Ponies In Hiding
Dojo Medical Insurance
The Graduating Class
Relaxative Emotions (Wrong Phone)
This Land Smells LIke It Wasn't Taken Good Of
Bad Touch Good Naked
Bowties And Boomerangs (Foster)
Following Pedestrians Into The Mall
Little Debbie Does Dallas
Central Frederalist's Iron Ore Grip
Making Life Safe Fro The Business Criminals
Publicly Funded
Deep Holes, Shallow Thoughts
Crisis Of Broken Fingers
You Can Skip Ad In 4...
He Wore Two Watches
Hotties And Notties
Running Smack In Vietnam
Electronic Service Requested
Stripper Girlfriend
That Scene From City Slickers
Said This To A Girl Once
Keep It Moving With The Buildabox
Fat Checker
High Forehead Hat Co.
Reheated Italian Food
More Talent In My Left Hand
The Alcoholic Has To Apologize
He Bought His Body Back
Independent Artist (Spandau Spandex)
Bring The Gun And Remember Gloves
The Israeli Prime Minister
Train Hoppin' And Cash Cloppin'
Speaking Truth To Power (Flamingos)
Throwing Knives At A Tree (Old Buttons)
Leather Pants (Alice In Chains Suck)
The Eighth Amigo
Basketball Coach Upset Off The Court
He Used To Work For Chick-Fil-A
River Water Boating Accidents
Bacon Tomato Lettuce Hot Dog Buns
Fingerless Gloves (25 Years)
Spring Break Pizza Party
Novelty Numbers And The Big Easy
All In The Name Of Liberty
A FEar Of Success
Posturing As A Populist
Abstinence Only Education
His Story Must Be Told
Passed Up For Promotion
Overpaying On Tariffs
Right In The Nuts
Balding Anger (With Coupon)
Two Chicks At The Same Time
Peter Pipes His Pecker (Lonesome Dove Soap)
Acres Of Pot, Man
That Strip Joint Day Shift
Tides Of March Pods
Relentless Shopping Lists (Wax Paper)
Leeches Are Sucking Lies From The Truth
Hard Times Working Part Time
Nebraska In A No-Go Zone
The Package Was Torn
Making Moves Now
Booze Cruise With Just Dudes
Fat Girl Beef
He Held His Pee Til It Hurt To Fart
She Couldn't Talk To A Doctor About It
Light On The Anger
Falconing With Rome
The Steve Miller Bland (Airplanes)
Brown Bag With A Wet Bottom
Closing An Open Door
Cranky Carney On Crank
Pressing And Rotating Buttons
Jumping Up And Down
Air Butt N B
Passing Stopped Traffic
Filling Out The Form In Triplicate
Sounds Like Disappointment
The Evolution Of Flight
Suicide By Diet
Last Car In The Funeral Procession Pays For Parking
Lawn Darting For Profit
The Laundry Mat Held Hell To Fires
Pants All Stuck Up In Her Butt
Baby Mama Butt Pants
Enjoying Being Pissed On (Reindear)
Parading The Exceptional Employee
A Mile Of Wire
The Guy With The Goatee
Heating Up The Salsa
She Got Dick Everynight (Lean Cuisine)
Retired Tubing Enthusiasts
Two Seniors In High School
The Big Beach Blast Kegger Flake Fest
Trannies AT The Bodega
A Guy On TV Talked About A Rain Event
Unwashed Black Dirty Boots
Policeman's Grave
Discount Chili Dogs
Thick Black Magic Markers
The Curse Of T-Mobile
A Northern Blew Through
Pack And A Half
Speed Limit 15 MPH
Telling Someone Something Unsettling
Mom Butting Like A Paper Towel
No Interest Same As Ass
Mr. Ed's Tailor Leaves Town
Lounging On Towels For Fame And Profit
A Torn Tornado (Only In Theatres)
Toddlers In The Toaster
All Contained In The Can
Heavy D In Winter
Divorce In An Elevator
Jerry Seinfeld And His Lower Lip
Pies And Pied Pipers
Penitentiary Pen Pal (overweight woman)
Misusing An Apostrophe
On The Take (Salads)
Bringing Up Piping
Fig Newtons Of Imagination
The Devil Went Down To Wendy's
The Locations of Downed Jetliners
Based On Electability
Unbottled Wine (Smell the Cork)
Calling Out Her Name
Too Many Cartoons
Ways To Go
Caught In a Cult
A Very Discrete Decision (Beach Owls)
Not Gaining Any Ground
An Unprotected Left
Mr. Bombastic Failed To Be Fantastic
Overflowing Oceans
Longing For Relief of Night Vision
Contributing Nothing To Society
Public Health Needs
Violent Credit Check Form
Embargo A Go Go
He Wished He Wanted Her
Hurling Water Balloons
Qualifying For The Foot Race
Economics Macro Action
Frayed Wiring
sunglasses sand in both eyes
Floating Towards Infinity
Grasping a Straw Until It Bent
Under the Blood Red Counter Dope
The Van Had Weak Breaks
Petite Violet Withdrawals
Done Wrong Done Right
The Lazy Susan and Moderna
Big Doings in the Persian Gulf
Lingering Doubt (Clothing Asterisks)
Refining Techniques
Face Moving Talking Taxes
Bless This Mess (Torn Leather)
Disturbing Trends In Sticker Collecting
More Piano Parts
Minivan Slow
Hugh Hefner Was a Dork
Cheap Seats Fixed Baseball Games
Throughfare Moldy Oldies
Claws Retracted
The Sight of Tom Hanks
Last Refuge (Bubbles)
Unlit Cigar (Small Willie Style)
Satan's Wet Wipes
Computers Doing Real Good
Supply Side Economics Closet
Blowing Shit Up, Getting Things Done
Low Heat Blast Furnace Repair
Buying a Bag at the Airport
Doing Wrong By Lying
Nostril Oversight Committee
From Commerce To Labor
Beige Ops (Look Out)
Shipping Container
Bending Acorns With Ones Mind
Using the Guest Towels
Ringing Doorbell, You Home
Giveaways and Takeaways
Compact Cars
Two Room Schoolhouse
Touching the Soft Spot
Grifting Drifting
Insincere Tire Damage
Doing That Guitar Slide Thing
Walking In Sunshine
Record Sales Were Slumping
The Line at Luby's
Exterminator Stock Exchange
Five Hours for the Ship to Sink
Chuck "Steak" Todd's Failure
Halos With Concentric Circles
Binding Disagreement
Trying to Weld Promises
Tenured Mechanic
Truth Squares (Frosted)
Creator
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